Questions About Friendship

Lately I've been thinking a lot about friends. I don't have very many. It seems like evrytime I make new ones I don't keep them. It seems like thier is just always something.

I watch my daughter walk up to other kids at McDonalds and say Hi and she has a new friend to play with. Most of the time we don't see them after that afternoon, and she's OK with that. She also remembers the names of the girls that she played soccer with over a year ago and asks about them. She also remembers kids that she played with at school and my friends kids. Whenever they play together, its like they have never been apart. The just pick right up and jump into a game.

I tried doing that as a grown up and I failed. When I joined Facebook I immediately connected with so many people that I went to school with. Who cared that it had been 15 years? We shared pictures, chattted on the phone, met for coffee, and tried to pick up where we left off. It just didn't work for me. We are all in different places of our lives, different relationships, different friends, different lifestyles. That bond that we once shared is gone. The glue that held us together is no more.

I walked away from most of these "friendships" feeling hurt and used.
Wanna catch up and have lunch? That means lets just talk about me while I lecture you because you're getting a divorce and are a little down.
Wanna stay at my place and get away from your ex for the night? That means you can crash on my sofa after you've played designated driver and listen to me have sex with a guy that doesn't really care about me. Then we can have breakfast and you can listen to me cry about it.
Wanna bring your daughter over to play with my kids? That means I can get SUPER drunk, fall down, and become unable to watch and feed my own kids. You can take care of all 4 of them cause I'm a mess.
Wanna talk about how your feeling about guys? That means I'm gonna listen for 10 mins, then lecture you about how you are an idiot with no experiance with guys. I'm gonna make you feel SO bad about your self that you can't believe that you would even talk to a guy again.
Wanna talk about that cute boy that you have been flirting with? That means I have to tell you, even though you guys have a little bit of a thing, he sent me naked pics and we had phone sex. And I've told everyone else and they think that you are an idiot. I also said I don't care if you get hurt, I want him more. Oh well for you.

I mean, seriously? Who needs friends like that. And yet, as each friendship ends, I feel bad. Like maybe its me. Maybe I'm not a good friend. Why do girls have to tear each other down like this? Its seriously enough to make me just want to not hang out with anyone ever again.